Deepest Fear
by ScorplinginTraining
Summary: After all this time, it's still her deepest fear. Only now she's living it.


DEEPEST FEAR

 **AN: Heavy angst warning here. I'm still battling the heartbreak of the finale followed by the cancellation. I'm attempting light-hearted again with my other WIP, but I still have these sad, sad one shots rolling around in my head. Thanks for reading!**

 **oxoxoxoxoxo**

She'd meant to make a polite appearance. That was all. The smile she pasted on along with her carefully applied make-up had to show the world, and him, she wasn't dying inside every second she was there.

So before her expression could fade to a pained grimace, or worse, dissolve into tears, she intended to congratulate the happy couple in passing as the entire hoard made its way to the reception, then discreetly duck out a side door.

The torture would be over soon. No need to prolong it.

But she forgot about the damned pictures. The endless hours and hours of photos from every possible angle. Recapturing that first kiss as man and wife. The bride's delighted family. The groom's laughing, teasing attendants. A close up of the shiny, new rings on clasped newlywed hands.

She found herself getting herded along to the reception hall with everyone else. She would have to stick it out a little longer.

She strolled the periphery of the room hoping for relative invisibility among the less important guests and well-wishers. She nearly panicked and bolted when his too-observant eyes spied her and he cut across the room in her direction. Instead, she mentally braced herself. After this inevitable encounter, she could go.

"Thank you for coming, Paige," Walter's smile was hesitant as if he didn't know how his gratitude would be received. But it was genuine. And she was glad for that.

"Of course. Thank you for inviting me," she answered.

Well, weren't they both _so_ courteous?

With nothing left to say, they both glanced over at the bride who was dancing with her father in the spotlight. The woman was stunning with her face full of joy and hope for her future with her brand new husband.

"Would you like to… uh," Walter indicated the dance floor with a tilt of his head.

No. Not this. Please. It's too much to ask.

Tacking the stiff smile back in place she answered, "Oh, uh… sure."

He didn't hold out his hand for hers this time. So she trailed after him doing her best not to admire the way his shoulders filled out his tuxedo jacket.

Paige lightly placed a hand on Walter's shoulder and tried to ignore the pang she felt when he laid the flat of his hand on the small of her back and curled his fingers around hers. The way she'd taught him to do it a lifetime ago.

Those were the only points of contact, but she felt his touch all over. Just like she had the first time and every time after.

A few uncomfortable seconds passed while they avoided each other's eyes. His gaze landed on their feet and he said softly, "It means a lot that you came. I didn't know if you would."

"My son was the best man," she shrugged and said with false brightness, "I couldn't miss that."

"He always was."

The silence fell again as they swayed.

The unnatural smile slipped a little when she asked, "Are you happy? Please tell me you're happy."

He nodded and his voice was sure when he replied, "I am." His eyes searched out and found the bride. The softening of those dark, expressive eyes and his quiet smile knifed straight through the very center of her heart.

"Does she mind that we're dancing together?" Paige hated herself for asking, but it would make her feel better somehow if she was still seen as some sort of threat, even though she was aware it was extremely petty and small of her.

"Oh, no," Walter chuckled a little. "I mean, she knows our history. But she trusts me. She knows how it is."

What could she say to that? Walter's new wife trusted him… like Paige never did.

"That's-that's good, then." Paige bit her lip hard to keep it from trembling.

"It is. Good, I mean. It isn't the same. With her. It's not as... intense. Or as terrifying. But it's… nice. Steady. Solid. She knows me, Paige. And accepts all my flaws. Helps me to improve, yes. But her expectations are… realistic. She decided she loves me in spite of, well, me. She'll stay with me. And I will always love her for that."

Yes, it was nice. She would stay with Walter, when all Paige ever did was up and leave. His wife accepted who and what he was, baggage and all, like Paige refused to do out of some misguided sense of pride that demanded she deserved more.

Paige supposed they all got exactly what they deserved in the end.

xxxxxxxxxxx

Paige sat straight up, her heart hammering, her breath sawing in and out as the scalding tears spilled over.

Walter was at her side in seconds, the concern in his beautiful face was confusing after the dream. But so completely welcome. So, so welcome.

"Are you okay? Are you ill?"

She could only shake and cling to him, fisting her hands in his shirt, drawing him in and dampening those familiar shoulders with her tears and drinking in his Walter smell.

He stroked an unsure hand over her back, smoothed her damp hair away from her blotchy, tear-ravaged face. "What can I do?"

Paige took a shuddering breath and whispered, "It was so real."

"It was a dream? Do… do you want to tell me? Do you want to talk?" He was trying so hard to understand her better these days.

What was it Toby said? Sometimes you rob the demon of its power if you tell someone? And she and Walter _had_ promised to be honest with each other going forward.

What safer place to reveal her fears than in the circle of Walter's arms?

For a few moments she couldn't say the words. Then she forced them out anyway.

"You… It was your w-wedding."

Walter huffed out a humorless laugh and kissed the top of her head. "Was it that bad? Did someone get drunk and turn over the punch bowl? Did I embarrass you? Did your dress catch on fire?"

And with those words, the demon's power dissipated in a puff of sulfurous smoke. Naturally, Walter had assumed if it was his wedding, it was _hers_ too.

Paige kissed him hard. "You know what? It's too ridiculous to say. It was a nightmare that will never, ever happen. You know why? Because I love you and you love me. And we're us again. And we're solid. Nothing is going to come between us again. I want you for always. Do you hear me? Walter, let's get married."

His grin was as adorable as it was puzzled. "What? _Now_?" Ever the problem solver, he added, "I guess the chapels in Vegas are open twenty-four hours…"

 **P.S. In case you're experiencing a little deja vu, this is a companion piece of sorts to lookingforthestars latest one shot 'Instead'. If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it and all her other stories. She has wonderful insight into these characters. I did get her permission before publishing this story. Thanks, my friend and fellow broken-hearted Waige shipper!**


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